this past weekend.
-Yes.
-Before the Grammys,
you were on vacation, though,
in Australia and Japan?
-Yes. Well, vacation
in Australia,
and Japan was just work.
-Oh, really?
-Yes.
-What do you do, like,
when you go on vacation?
What does Sam Smith do?
-Oh, God, I eat a lot of cheese.
[ Laughter ]
-You eat a lot of cheese.
-And I drink a lot of alcohol.
[ Laughter ]
-They go well together.
-Yeah. And then get very burned
in the sun.
-Yeah.
-That's kind of it.
'Cause I don't tan, so...
-But do you go out?
Do you go to bars or clubs or...
-Yeah, oh, my God. We've had --
I had some mad nights
in some gay bars in Sydney.
I had one really bad night where
I, like, puked at the bar,
'cause I was so drunk.
[ Laughter ]
-What are you talking about?
You can't do that.
-I did a shot and then I...
I did a shot of tequila,
and it went down --
-Down the wrong way.
Oh, yeah. No.
-And then I just puked
in my hand.
[ Laughter ]
-So, needless to say, that night
didn't go too well. Oh, yeah.
-Oh, that was a great night.
-Oh, really?
-Great night. Yeah, great night.
-And what was Japan?
Japan was just --
-Japan was work, just doing
promo for the record.
-Yeah.
-I mean, some kind of --
-I mean, it's number one
in countries and you just...
-Yeah.
-You went to Korea as well,
you said?
-No, karaoke bars.
-Oh, sorry.
[ Laughter ]
I thought you went to Korea
as well. Oh, tell me.
Oh, karaoke bars?
-Yeah.
-You do karaoke?
-I don't, but my band did.
I hate karaoke.
-You do?
-Mm.
-Why?
-I don't think karaoke works
if you -- if you can sing.
[ Laughter ]
[ Cheers and applause ]
-I guess so. You're right.
Yeah, yeah.
It's not fun if you actually can
sing for a living.
-No.
-I don't know, but I would love
to see you get up
and do something
that wasn't your song.
-Nah. Never.
[ Cheers and applause ]
-Yes.
-No, never.
-Everyone wants it.
You would never, ever do it?
-No. I'll only -- I'll only ever
do Fifth Harmony.
-That would be the only one
that you would do.
-Ever, that's the only one.
Ever.
-That's the only one.
Do you remember the last time
you were on this show and I
talked you as -- we were talking
about the other album,
which I loved. And I kept --
I told you that my favorite song
was...
♪♪ Money on my mind,
money on my mind ♪♪
♪♪ I do it, I do it for love,
and money on my mind ♪♪
♪♪ Money on my mind, I do it ♪♪
Yeah, and I sang it
just like that.
Probably even better now,
than...
[ Laughter ]
And you said to me, you said,
"You know what? I don't really
love that one of my songs."
-Yeah.
-"I don't really love
"that song that much,
and now you reminded me how much
I don't like it, and I'm never
going to do it ever again."
-Yeah, guess what?
I haven't sang it since.
[ Laughter ]
-I just want to
apologize to your fans.
I love that song.
Did I make you
not want to sing that song?
-You made me hate it even more
than I did.
[ Laughter ]
-I'm so sorry!
It's a great song.
-It's all right. I don't know if
I'm ever going to sing it again.
[ Laughter ]
-Why? It's so fun.
-It's annoying to me now.
It's annoying. [ Laughs ]
-Because it --
I had that effect? No, please.
-No.
-You have to take --
You have to forget
that I did that.
-No, it's all right.
I'll revamp it on the tour.
And you can come and do it
with me when I play in New York.
-Oh, really?
-Yeah.
[ Cheers and applause ]
-I would love to.
I'd be honored.
-That would be amazing.
-I would love to do it.
-I'd love that.
-You are playing --
You're playing Barclays Center,
June th,
Madison Square Garden,
June th.
But when does the tour start?
Where does it start?
It start in England?
-Yeah, in England.
Somewhere called Sheffield.
-Oh, yeah.
[ Cheers ]
-Which is very, very random.
Is someone from Sheffield?
-Yeah, we allow --
Yeah, we have two people
from Sheffield
that come to every show.
[ Laughter ]
They don't leave.
But that's where it starts.
And are you going to be around
for the royal wedding?
-No. I'm -- it's on my birthday,
the royal wedding.
-How dare them!
-I know. I know.
-Guys, check with Sam Smith
if you're going to get married.
Hello!
-I know.
-It's un--
-It's good, it will be
a royal-themed birthday.
-Yeah, why not?
-So, that will be fun.
I'll be in Portugal.
-Would you ever play at
the wedding if he invited you?
Or they invited you?
-Um, I mean, my songs are quite
sad for weddings.
[ Laughter ]
-I'll tell you what
song is not sad.
♪♪ Money on my mind,
money on my mind ♪♪
♪♪ I do it,
I do it for the love ♪♪
Oh, I love it.
It's such good.
-I'll do that. I'll do that
at the wedding.
[ Laughter ]
-Sorry, sorry.
I won't bring it up anymore.
I want to talk about
"The Thrill of it All."
Congratulations on a number one
record right here.
[ Cheers and applause ]
-Thank you.
-So many good songs on here.
I heard that you --
you recorded --
or wrote songs
for this album.
-Yeah. Mm.
- songs.
-I think a bit over, yeah.
-But there's only
on this record.
-I know, I know. I know.
-So what happens
to the other ?
-They're gone. Dead.
-What do you mean?
-Yeah, I know.
I was running over --
over / years,
and I write all the time.
And I have a theory that for
every one song, there's like,
songs that go into it.
It's like a journey to get
to that one song.
-Wow.
-That's how it works with me.
-Oh, my goodness.
-Yeah, it's quite a lot.
-But maybe -- can't you just put
out a record called,
you know, "Songs For Jimmy"?
[ Laughter ]
You know, and just put out --
just put out ? Just...
-No, 'cause you would only want
the "Money on my Mind" ones.
[ Laughter ]
-I'll take some remixes.
Exactly, no. I would just be --
I mean, wow.
I guess you have to do it
to make those --
-Oh, there's bad ones, though.
-Oh, yeah.
-I'd say at least, like, % of them are just bad.
-Really?
-Yeah.
Sometimes I'm either, like,
too depressing when I'm writing,
or I'm trying to sound like
Beyoncé, and it doesn't work.
[ Laughter ]
-Do -- do you ever get sad
and you go... [ Exhales deeply ]
"Start writing, 'cause this is
a good time. This is a good --"
-Yeah, yeah.
-Really?
-And sometimes
it's too depressing.
-You're like, no, this is evil.
-Yeah.
-Yeah, just throw it away now.
-Yeah, it's too much.
-And then are you ever
in too much of a good mood?
And you go --
-Oh, yeah, yeah.
-This is too cut --
-I've written
so many happy songs.
-Yeah.
-I really have,
and they're just awful.
[ Laughter ]
-It just doesn't fit you.
-No.
-No. Well, I can't wait
to see you on tour. It kicks off
in the U.K. in a few weeks.
Guys, "The Thrill of it All,"
Sam Smith. It's out now.
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